The Short and Excruciatingly Embarrassing Reign of Captain Abbott

Book excerpt: Poor people don't drive cars. People have the right to be bigots. I'm a fixer. Team Australia. Shirtfronting. Choppergate. Stop the boats. Coal is good for humanity. No cuts to health or the ABC. Sir Prince Philip. Flags. It's all the fault of a febrile media. In August 2013, Australia welcomed Tony Abbott as its new prime minister. This promised to be a marriage between responsible government and a nation tired of the endless drama of the Gillard - Rudd years. But then... well... Fairfax columnist Andrew P Street details the litany of gaffes, goofs and questionable captain's calls that characterised the subsequent reign of the Abbott government, following the trail from bold promises to questionable realities, unlikely recoveries to inexplicable own goals, and Malcolm Turnbull's assurances of support to the day he pushed the Captain off his bike once and for all. And all this comes with a colourful cast of supporting characters and dangerous loons that only a nation unfamiliar with the concept of below - the - line voting could elect. Here is a unique take on a politics Australian style. If Game of Thrones was a deeply irreverent book about politics, then the TV series would probably not rate nearly as well. It would, however, look something like this.